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Tuesday
Aug022011

Are You a Spendaholic? A Questionnaire for Members of Congress

DollarDrinkiStockHorizWIs spending an addiction much like alcoholism? It sure appears to be the case.

We modified 11 questions from Johns Hopkins University's "Test for Alcoholism" to create a "Test for Spendaholism," by substituting the words "drink" and "drinking" with the words "spend" and "spending." Like the Johns Hopkins questionnaire, the result of our quiz will not only determine whether someone (a Member of Congress) has a problem, but the stage of the problem.

Are you brave enough to take the test?

Congressional Spendaholic Test

1. Is spending affecting your reputation? (Okay, be honest here... A Gallup poll taken last month found that only 18% of the American people approve of the job Congress is doing compared 77% who disapprove.)

2. Is spending jeopardizing your job or business? (58 incumbents lost their bids for re-election in 2010, largely due to negative public reaction to massive new spending programs such as ObamaCare.)

3. Has your ambition decreased since spending? (Have you come to believe our debt problem is due to an insufficient credit line, not excessive spending? Do you believe passage of short-term continuing resolutions, rather than full budgets, constitutes a good day's work?)

4. Do you spend to build up your self-confidence? (Bridge to Nowhere... Need we say more?)

5. Have you gotten into financial difficulties as a result of your spending? (The U.S.'s mounting debt is all but certain to result in the loss of our nation's AAA credit rating.)

6. Do you turn to lower companions and an inferior environment when spending? (You hang out with lobbyists with the NEA, Teamsters, the AFL-CIO, SEIU, the radical environmental lobby, and the AARP and you borrow from communist Chinese dictators... Enough said.)

7. Does spending make you careless of your family's welfare? (Medicare will run out of money by 2024 and Social Security will run out of money by 2036, thanks to your fiscal irresponsibility. The per capita debt is now approximately $46,000, digging a financial hole for our children and grandchildren from which they may never be able to escape.)

8. Is spending making your home life unhappy? (Have those town hall meetings lost their spark, their magic? Do your constituents accuse you of being unfaithful?)

9. Have your ever had a complete loss of memory as a result of your spending? ("I never said I wouldn't support funding for nationally-vital government projects in my district, only wasteful earmarks in my colleagues' districts.")

10. Do you spend to escape from worries or troubles? (Now why did you vote for that $787 billion stimulus package? How's that work'in for ya?)

11. Do you crave spending at a definite time daily? (Only when you are in session you say?)

Score yourself

Two "yes" answers indicates a probable spending problem.

Three to five "yes" answers indicates early stage spendaholism.

Six to eight "yes" answers indicates middle stage spendaholism.

Nine to eleven "yes" answers indicates late-stage spendaholism.

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